Been a bit out of the loop the last few days. Not sure why, but no ambition the last few days, sleeping quite a bit more than normal. Still no ambition, but need to get a few things done, got leads on a couple of jobs that I need to apply for, so I'm trying to crawl back into the race.
Remember, eyes forward, one foot in front of the other, one step at a time.
Wednesday, September 30, 2009
Saturday, September 26, 2009
Sunset
Just had to share the beautiful sunset tonight with everyone. Don't know why, but I've just noticed that I seem to have a habit of taking pictures while driving at the speed limit, or maybe even just a little, ahem, over.
A gorgeous early fall sunset in Northern MN.
A gorgeous early fall sunset in Northern MN.
Monday, September 21, 2009
It's Over
Well, as of now the divorce is final. The paperwork needs to be typed up and filed, but effective about 5:15 PM today the divorce is final.
No winners here. Looking back over the 28 years (plus a few months) that we were together, a great deal of everything that we built is now gone. However, trying to be positive about it, we did raise 4 children to adulthood together. There were quite a few mistakes along the way; and if I could do it over again I would change a few things, but we were successful (I think) in raising four productive members of society. That in itself should be ranked as a pretty good accomplishment considering society these days.
However, I'm coming out of this with some huge debts, no job, and almost nothing in the way of resources in an economy that is the worst it has been in my lifetime, I think. This is very depressing, especially when I look back to a year ago and remember that we were sitting on top of the world, with a great job, property, and almost no debt.
I still don't know where I'm going to go from here. I really can't live in my car much longer, but I also have no prospects for work at the moment. I have no income, no medical insurance. I'm now out of the anti-depressants and tranquilizers that I have been taking for the last few months trying to get thru this, and no way to buy more. I need to find someplace to put the few belongings that I have been awarded in the settlement, but don't know where. I was looking forward to possibly retiring in a few years, but that is out of the question now.
So, at this point I need to take stock of who I am, what I have, what I am capable of, where I am at, and decide what I will do.
This will be quite the challenge.
No winners here. Looking back over the 28 years (plus a few months) that we were together, a great deal of everything that we built is now gone. However, trying to be positive about it, we did raise 4 children to adulthood together. There were quite a few mistakes along the way; and if I could do it over again I would change a few things, but we were successful (I think) in raising four productive members of society. That in itself should be ranked as a pretty good accomplishment considering society these days.
However, I'm coming out of this with some huge debts, no job, and almost nothing in the way of resources in an economy that is the worst it has been in my lifetime, I think. This is very depressing, especially when I look back to a year ago and remember that we were sitting on top of the world, with a great job, property, and almost no debt.
I still don't know where I'm going to go from here. I really can't live in my car much longer, but I also have no prospects for work at the moment. I have no income, no medical insurance. I'm now out of the anti-depressants and tranquilizers that I have been taking for the last few months trying to get thru this, and no way to buy more. I need to find someplace to put the few belongings that I have been awarded in the settlement, but don't know where. I was looking forward to possibly retiring in a few years, but that is out of the question now.
So, at this point I need to take stock of who I am, what I have, what I am capable of, where I am at, and decide what I will do.
This will be quite the challenge.
Sunday, September 13, 2009
Beautiful Day
Had an absolutely beautiful day at the park today. Good company, good conversation, good shade, great day. It was a sunny warm day, upper 70's perhaps, with a light breeze. Won't see too many more of them this year this far north.
What a day!
What a day!
Saturday, September 12, 2009
Forward
Gotta keep reminding myself to look forward. I think that part of my problem is that all I can do right now is wait. I can do almost nothing until 9/21, and until that is settled I have no way to look past that date.
What I need is a diversion. What can I do between now and 9/21? Something to keep me occupied. I can't exercise any of my hobbies, Betty has my library and my guitars and my rifles and my reloading equipment and my swords and my music and my records and my woodworking tools and my mechanics tools and my tractor and my pickup and my wagon and my Ventura and my bicycle and...well, you get the idea (although why she won't let me have any of it escapes my reasoning, she can't use any of it). And my attention span on the PC is very short right now, and if I run into a computer problem I get frustrated really fast. I still need to relax some more. The only thing I have is the car, and I don't have gas or insurance for it right now, so I can't take it for a drive or go to Bemidji or Duluth or someplace different. I would try doing some wood carving, but my pocket knife is very dull and Betty won't let me have my knife sharpener (again, why? Is it just spite? Dog in the manger?).
Somehow I need to figure out how to do nothing and enjoy it, but when I'm doing nothing then my mind starts going, and when I run out of "forward" space I start to focus on the rear view mirror again.
I need something to dooo!!!!!!!! before I go any crazier than I already am.
What I need is a diversion. What can I do between now and 9/21? Something to keep me occupied. I can't exercise any of my hobbies, Betty has my library and my guitars and my rifles and my reloading equipment and my swords and my music and my records and my woodworking tools and my mechanics tools and my tractor and my pickup and my wagon and my Ventura and my bicycle and...well, you get the idea (although why she won't let me have any of it escapes my reasoning, she can't use any of it). And my attention span on the PC is very short right now, and if I run into a computer problem I get frustrated really fast. I still need to relax some more. The only thing I have is the car, and I don't have gas or insurance for it right now, so I can't take it for a drive or go to Bemidji or Duluth or someplace different. I would try doing some wood carving, but my pocket knife is very dull and Betty won't let me have my knife sharpener (again, why? Is it just spite? Dog in the manger?).
Somehow I need to figure out how to do nothing and enjoy it, but when I'm doing nothing then my mind starts going, and when I run out of "forward" space I start to focus on the rear view mirror again.
I need something to dooo!!!!!!!! before I go any crazier than I already am.
Rediscover Your Inner Gift
Just found this article on MSNBC; if I could have copied it here I would have but it's done in flash.
Rediscover Your Inner Gift
Rediscover Your Inner Gift
Warm
Well, I needed to go to the store to get a present for a friend, and then I was going to drop it off. Walked about 2 miles and turned around and headed back for my friendly shade. I did get the present.
It's only about 70 degrees, but the humidity is up and there is not a cloud in the sky, and just enough breeze to make the leaves quiver a bit on the popple. I am soaking wet from head to toe, and I mean soaking wet. I'll bet you could wring a quart of sweat out of my shirt and jeans right now.
If I wasn't so totally out of energy I would get out my shorts and go to a lake. But instead I think I will take a nap in the shade.
It's only about 70 degrees, but the humidity is up and there is not a cloud in the sky, and just enough breeze to make the leaves quiver a bit on the popple. I am soaking wet from head to toe, and I mean soaking wet. I'll bet you could wring a quart of sweat out of my shirt and jeans right now.
If I wasn't so totally out of energy I would get out my shorts and go to a lake. But instead I think I will take a nap in the shade.
Moving Pains
With the move from hosting this on my own website to having it hosted on a free website comes quite a few changes. I can't make this look like the old one, which, whether you liked it or not, was laid out the way I liked it, for my convenience. Can't do that here. Also, the plugins that I used for the photo galleries don't work here, nor did the photos from the galleries come over.
So, I have to do a lot of rebuilding. I have all the pictures from the old website, I just need to rebuild the pages that contained them and upload them here. BTW, kudos to the support staff here at wordpress.com. When I asked them for help, they were able to transfer all the photos that were actually in the blog entries from the old website to here. For me, those would have been difficult, I would need to go thru over 400 posts and look for the missing photo and download it and upload it and re-link it. Wordpress Support took care of those. I just need to go thru the 17 pages and take care of the photos on them.
On another subject of moving, my guess is that I will almost certainly be heading for the Metro area to look for work after the divorce is final. Here in the northern part of the state there are only a handful of employers that can use my skills, and I know most of my counterparts in those positions. In the Twin Cities Metro area there are 100's of companies that can use my talent, and quite a few of them have hundreds of employees doing what I do, so there are lots of possibilities there. And like I said before, I need to get out of the Grand Rapids area, just too many memories here. I wouldn't mind going to Bemidji to be closer to the kids and close to a 4 year college, but again, there are only a couple of employers with only a couple of jobs and I know several of those folks up there already.
And it's kinda frustrating. I've been applying in every place for any job I know I can do. I've applied at WalMart and been interviewed for a job, but since I know and they know that I could be making almost 10 times the salary in my profession they don't want to hire me and train me knowing that I will be leaving soon. Home Depot, same story. KMart, same story. Holiday, same story. 99 cent store, same story, and the list is very long. For the month that I haven't been at the hospital I have applied for at least 150 jobs in Grand Rapids and Bemidji, and gotten back similar responses from about half.
So, I need to be looking forward. It is sooo easy to look back and wonder what I could have should have would have done differently, but I need to look forward. Somewhere out there is a place for me that involves less stress, uses my talents productively, and gets me where I want to be. I need to be looking forward. Just like in a car, you have to be looking and planning for the road and traffic ahead while being aware of what's in the mirror. But if you focus on the mirror and don't look ahead you will be in trouble in a second. For the last six months I've been focused on the mirror, and look where it has gotten me. I'm finally starting to look forward again, and I need to keep my focus out there in front of me and determine where and what I'm going to do.
Because I'm an introspective type of person I need to analyze the why and how of everything. It is very very easy for me to focus my attention and my problem solving power on the past, trying to analyze where and how I went wrong. However, it doesn't help a lot when I start trying to relive the past. It's good to know how and why I went wrong, but once that has been determined it does no good to keep worrying over it. I need to take the lesson to heart and start analyzing the why and how of my life ahead using those lessons from the past. What does it say up above? "Experience is knowing a lot of things you shouldn't do again". OK, so I've had the experience, now it's time to move forward without repeating the same mistakes.
I probably don't have the quote right, and I don't recall where it came from but I wish I did. As I recall, it was from a scifi story about time travel: "The mind goes back, but time goes on, and farewells should be forever."
Time to start moving forward. There are a few loose ends from the recent past that need to be wrapped up, but then I will be moving forward. There are better things out there ahead for me, I just need to go out and get them. I know it won't be easy. I need to prepare myself for a long tough road ahead, but I can't do that by looking in the rear view mirror. I can only prepare myself for the road ahead by watching the road ahead, aware of what has gone on before and brought me to this place. But focused ahead!
Addenda Just discovered that only the photos from the last 6 months were moved over, whether in pages or blog posts, so I still need to do everything before then. It will take me a LONG time because I don't get much Internet time. But, I need to do it ASAP because right now the ONLY copies of these photos are on my old laptop.
So, I have to do a lot of rebuilding. I have all the pictures from the old website, I just need to rebuild the pages that contained them and upload them here. BTW, kudos to the support staff here at wordpress.com. When I asked them for help, they were able to transfer all the photos that were actually in the blog entries from the old website to here. For me, those would have been difficult, I would need to go thru over 400 posts and look for the missing photo and download it and upload it and re-link it. Wordpress Support took care of those. I just need to go thru the 17 pages and take care of the photos on them.
On another subject of moving, my guess is that I will almost certainly be heading for the Metro area to look for work after the divorce is final. Here in the northern part of the state there are only a handful of employers that can use my skills, and I know most of my counterparts in those positions. In the Twin Cities Metro area there are 100's of companies that can use my talent, and quite a few of them have hundreds of employees doing what I do, so there are lots of possibilities there. And like I said before, I need to get out of the Grand Rapids area, just too many memories here. I wouldn't mind going to Bemidji to be closer to the kids and close to a 4 year college, but again, there are only a couple of employers with only a couple of jobs and I know several of those folks up there already.
And it's kinda frustrating. I've been applying in every place for any job I know I can do. I've applied at WalMart and been interviewed for a job, but since I know and they know that I could be making almost 10 times the salary in my profession they don't want to hire me and train me knowing that I will be leaving soon. Home Depot, same story. KMart, same story. Holiday, same story. 99 cent store, same story, and the list is very long. For the month that I haven't been at the hospital I have applied for at least 150 jobs in Grand Rapids and Bemidji, and gotten back similar responses from about half.
So, I need to be looking forward. It is sooo easy to look back and wonder what I could have should have would have done differently, but I need to look forward. Somewhere out there is a place for me that involves less stress, uses my talents productively, and gets me where I want to be. I need to be looking forward. Just like in a car, you have to be looking and planning for the road and traffic ahead while being aware of what's in the mirror. But if you focus on the mirror and don't look ahead you will be in trouble in a second. For the last six months I've been focused on the mirror, and look where it has gotten me. I'm finally starting to look forward again, and I need to keep my focus out there in front of me and determine where and what I'm going to do.
Because I'm an introspective type of person I need to analyze the why and how of everything. It is very very easy for me to focus my attention and my problem solving power on the past, trying to analyze where and how I went wrong. However, it doesn't help a lot when I start trying to relive the past. It's good to know how and why I went wrong, but once that has been determined it does no good to keep worrying over it. I need to take the lesson to heart and start analyzing the why and how of my life ahead using those lessons from the past. What does it say up above? "Experience is knowing a lot of things you shouldn't do again". OK, so I've had the experience, now it's time to move forward without repeating the same mistakes.
I probably don't have the quote right, and I don't recall where it came from but I wish I did. As I recall, it was from a scifi story about time travel: "The mind goes back, but time goes on, and farewells should be forever."
Time to start moving forward. There are a few loose ends from the recent past that need to be wrapped up, but then I will be moving forward. There are better things out there ahead for me, I just need to go out and get them. I know it won't be easy. I need to prepare myself for a long tough road ahead, but I can't do that by looking in the rear view mirror. I can only prepare myself for the road ahead by watching the road ahead, aware of what has gone on before and brought me to this place. But focused ahead!
Addenda Just discovered that only the photos from the last 6 months were moved over, whether in pages or blog posts, so I still need to do everything before then. It will take me a LONG time because I don't get much Internet time. But, I need to do it ASAP because right now the ONLY copies of these photos are on my old laptop.
Thursday, September 10, 2009
Benediction: Changes and Decisions
It's sad, but it seems that all good things must come to an end. In another couple of days www.hartshorn.org will cease to exist. For over ten years I have kept this domain name (after losing the .net and .com domains) but now that I can no longer afford such frivolities (thanks, Betty!) it will go the way of the dodo.
In less than two weeks (hopefully!) the divorce will be final. I'm still not certain what I will do at that point, but my feeling is that I will follow the wild geese. One thing is certain: I can no longer remain in Northern MN. There are good memories and bad everywhere I glance, and the conflicting memories are tearing me apart. So, I will go in search of the River Lethe. I doubt I will be able to find it, but with time the memories will fade and the wounds should scar over. There are lots of job opportunities (and more housing) down in the Metro area, so I may go there.
I am closing most of my email accounts, but I will keep my original Hotmail account that I have had since HoTMaiL was begun in 1996.
Starting NOW the only way anyone will be able to contact is is via my Hotmail address or via comment on this blog. I will not be carrying a cell phone (can't afford the bill now), but free internet access is available almost everywhere now. I'm hoping that this 10 year old laptop will last a while yet, and if it does die there are libraries and other places out there that allow the public to use the computer, so I should be able to check my email at least occasionally.
May the LORD bless you and keep you;
May the LORD make his face shine upon you and be gracious to you;
May the LORD turn his face toward you and give you peace.
Numbers 6:24-26
In less than two weeks (hopefully!) the divorce will be final. I'm still not certain what I will do at that point, but my feeling is that I will follow the wild geese. One thing is certain: I can no longer remain in Northern MN. There are good memories and bad everywhere I glance, and the conflicting memories are tearing me apart. So, I will go in search of the River Lethe. I doubt I will be able to find it, but with time the memories will fade and the wounds should scar over. There are lots of job opportunities (and more housing) down in the Metro area, so I may go there.
I am closing most of my email accounts, but I will keep my original Hotmail account that I have had since HoTMaiL was begun in 1996.
Starting NOW the only way anyone will be able to contact is is via my Hotmail address or via comment on this blog. I will not be carrying a cell phone (can't afford the bill now), but free internet access is available almost everywhere now. I'm hoping that this 10 year old laptop will last a while yet, and if it does die there are libraries and other places out there that allow the public to use the computer, so I should be able to check my email at least occasionally.
May the LORD bless you and keep you;
May the LORD make his face shine upon you and be gracious to you;
May the LORD turn his face toward you and give you peace.
Numbers 6:24-26
Tuesday, September 8, 2009
T-Storms
5 PM: Maybe thunderstorms moving into area, kinda hope so. Grass around town is starting to look kinda dried up.
7:30 PM: They all seem to be sliding up to the north of us, but maybe if the front slides east just a few more miles....
Wednesday: False Alarm so far. Well, OK, we had a brief shower this morning.
7:30 PM: They all seem to be sliding up to the north of us, but maybe if the front slides east just a few more miles....
Wednesday: False Alarm so far. Well, OK, we had a brief shower this morning.
Monday, September 7, 2009
Labor Day
Well, I'm pretty proud of myself. I think I have spent an entire 3 day weekend without doing anything constructive. I can't even remember the last time I attempted that. Read 3 books, did a little fishing, took a couple of naps. Didn't fix anything or teach anyone or fetch anything. And I think I'm going to turn in early tonight. Have a busy rest of the week, I'll be paying for these days of sloth I know.
Jus' Sittin'
Well, wish I were, anyways. But I think I might be sitting under the trees watching the Mississippi River roll by today. Wish I had my guitar handy. Phone is off, not checking email or news, Just gonna do MY thing today and try to forget the rest of the mess.
THE DOCK OF THE BAY
written by Otis Redding and Steve Cropper
Sittin' in the mornin' sun
I'll be sittin' when the evenin' come
Watching the ships roll in
And then I watch 'em roll away again, yeah
I'm sittin' on the dock of the bay
Watching the tide roll away
Ooo, I'm just sittin' on the dock of the bay
Wastin' time
I left my home in Georgia
Headed for the 'Frisco bay
'Cause I've had nothing to live for
And look like nothin's gonna come my way
So I'm just gonna sit on the dock of the bay
Watching the tide roll away
Ooo, I'm sittin' on the dock of the bay
Wastin' time
Look like nothing's gonna change
Everything still remains the same
I can't do what ten people tell me to do
So I guess I'll remain the same, yes
Sittin' here resting my bones
And this loneliness won't leave me alone
It's two thousand miles I roamed
Just to make this dock my home
Now, I'm just gonna sit at the dock of the bay
Watching the tide roll away
Oooo-wee, sittin' on the dock of the bay
Wastin' time
THE DOCK OF THE BAY
written by Otis Redding and Steve Cropper
Sittin' in the mornin' sun
I'll be sittin' when the evenin' come
Watching the ships roll in
And then I watch 'em roll away again, yeah
I'm sittin' on the dock of the bay
Watching the tide roll away
Ooo, I'm just sittin' on the dock of the bay
Wastin' time
I left my home in Georgia
Headed for the 'Frisco bay
'Cause I've had nothing to live for
And look like nothin's gonna come my way
So I'm just gonna sit on the dock of the bay
Watching the tide roll away
Ooo, I'm sittin' on the dock of the bay
Wastin' time
Look like nothing's gonna change
Everything still remains the same
I can't do what ten people tell me to do
So I guess I'll remain the same, yes
Sittin' here resting my bones
And this loneliness won't leave me alone
It's two thousand miles I roamed
Just to make this dock my home
Now, I'm just gonna sit at the dock of the bay
Watching the tide roll away
Oooo-wee, sittin' on the dock of the bay
Wastin' time
Sunday, September 6, 2009
Weekend
Got to go to Bemidji Saturday and see some of the kids; was a lot of fun. Wish I could have spent more time visiting.
Went with Patty and Evvy and Phillip to Paul Bunyan Mall to see "The World At Night" exhibition. I sometimes wonder if I've seen it more than most of the locals; I'm absolutely fascinated by some of the photography. Pushed Phillip all over the Mall. Had a great discussion with Patty about English Litt.
Today (Sunday) I went up 38 and stopped at the Laurentian Divide site. Took the hiking trail and got to see the ice road and some huge fungi growing out of rotting stumps. It was nice and calm and peaceful back in the woods, a nice contrast to the way my life has been lately. Spent most of the day dreaming under the trees. Still not too good at having fun by myself but am re-learning how to relax.
Gorgeous weather this weekend, mid 70's with light fluffy clouds; perfect for spending time outdoors.
Went with Patty and Evvy and Phillip to Paul Bunyan Mall to see "The World At Night" exhibition. I sometimes wonder if I've seen it more than most of the locals; I'm absolutely fascinated by some of the photography. Pushed Phillip all over the Mall. Had a great discussion with Patty about English Litt.
Today (Sunday) I went up 38 and stopped at the Laurentian Divide site. Took the hiking trail and got to see the ice road and some huge fungi growing out of rotting stumps. It was nice and calm and peaceful back in the woods, a nice contrast to the way my life has been lately. Spent most of the day dreaming under the trees. Still not too good at having fun by myself but am re-learning how to relax.
Gorgeous weather this weekend, mid 70's with light fluffy clouds; perfect for spending time outdoors.
Friday, September 4, 2009
Tough weekend
I didn't even realize it until this afternoon, but this is Labor Day Weekend. Normally, I would be getting ready for a big BBQ family gathering with lots of visiting and fun, one of the highlights of my year. It was 21 years ago that we arrived in Grand Rapids, and it's supposed to be our big celebration.
So, now I'm really depressed. I mean, it hurts, it brings tears to my eyes.
So, now I'm really depressed. I mean, it hurts, it brings tears to my eyes.
Thursday, September 3, 2009
Foot Update
Gotten a little behind on this one, which is not to wondered at considering how much is going on in my life.
Got my new orthotics a couple of weeks ago. It was recommended that I wear them one hour the first day, two hours the second day, three hours the third day, and so on until I could wear them full time.
Ha! On the first day I fully intended wearing them only one hour, but I think it was three hours before I finally took them out of my shoe. Then I forgot to put them in the next day. Question: Should one put them in at 7AM and then take them out; or put them in at noon, or put them in x hours before bed time? That was my question. They weren't part of my morning routine, so they didn't get installed in the morning. By noon I had forgotten all about it. I think it was three days before I remembered to put the orthotics in again, and then I wore them for about six hours. They didn't give me any trouble. I then forgot for a couple more days, and the next time I remembered to put them in I left them in. I have been wearing them all day every day for a week and haven't had a bit of trouble.
One thing I did that I think may have been helpful, I'd like to check with a podiatrist but haven't had the opportunity. As soon as I found out the reason why I walk with my toes pointed out I started to make a conscious effort to keep my toes pointed straight. It took a few weeks, but eventually I was doing it most of the time, and I believe that exercise in conjunction with the PSC helped make a better transition.
And yes, my back and legs and feet notice the difference!
Got my new orthotics a couple of weeks ago. It was recommended that I wear them one hour the first day, two hours the second day, three hours the third day, and so on until I could wear them full time.
Ha! On the first day I fully intended wearing them only one hour, but I think it was three hours before I finally took them out of my shoe. Then I forgot to put them in the next day. Question: Should one put them in at 7AM and then take them out; or put them in at noon, or put them in x hours before bed time? That was my question. They weren't part of my morning routine, so they didn't get installed in the morning. By noon I had forgotten all about it. I think it was three days before I remembered to put the orthotics in again, and then I wore them for about six hours. They didn't give me any trouble. I then forgot for a couple more days, and the next time I remembered to put them in I left them in. I have been wearing them all day every day for a week and haven't had a bit of trouble.
One thing I did that I think may have been helpful, I'd like to check with a podiatrist but haven't had the opportunity. As soon as I found out the reason why I walk with my toes pointed out I started to make a conscious effort to keep my toes pointed straight. It took a few weeks, but eventually I was doing it most of the time, and I believe that exercise in conjunction with the PSC helped make a better transition.
And yes, my back and legs and feet notice the difference!
Another Pioneer Passes
Dick Eagan, the “E”in EMC2, died August 29, 2009 after a long battle with cancer. The Press release can be found here.
Wednesday, September 2, 2009
StrengthFinder 2.0
While at the Public Library last week I picked up a book titled "Now, Discover Your Strengths". The book was the result of MANY polls and MUCH research done by Gallup. It was a good read with some very good points, the biggest of which, in my opinion, is that people (and organizations) need to spend more time working from a position of strength rather than weakness.
For example. lets suppose that I can rate talent and work both on a scale of 1 to 5. I have a talent for X that is weak, say a 1. But If I work and practice I may get my strength up to maybe a 3. 3*1=3. OK, then let's say I have a talent Y that is very strong, a 5. If I work just as hard as I did with with X I can get my strength up to 5*3=15! So clearly, it makes sense to work on your strengths, and (get this!) partner with someone who is strong where you are weak!
The original book has now been replaced by "StrengthsFinder 2.0". There is an example in the new book of a person who had the ability to make 100 pairs of shoes per week, but because he had to spend so much time at sales and collections (which he hated) he only could make 30 pairs a week. So, he got a partner who was good at collections and sales, and focused on his natural ability to make good shoes and more than tripled his income.
Point being, what do we normally do? In my case, I'm not very good at relating to others. So, I get sent to classes to teach me how to manage and relate, both things I am not good at and dislike. And I get marked down in reviews because I don't have very good communication and delegation skills. What should be happening is that I should be able to partner with someone that has the skills I lack and let me focus on improving my natural talents of learning and thinking.
Here is the brief summary of my strengths in relative order; anyone that has known me very long will recognize these:
Learner: The excitement is in the process of learning.
Intellection: Likes meaningful conversation; eschews idle chit-chat.
Input: Craving to know more.
Deliberative: Think about things first.
Ideation: Likes to find new and better ways to do things.
By the way, this aligns with some freebie tests I've taken on the Internet such as the Keirsey and Myers-Briggs. However, to get detailed results you need to spend $30-$50 for the results. The "StrengthsFinder 2.0" book cost me less than $20 (including shipping) from Amazon.com and includes the Internet test (maxed out my Visa to get it, but figure it is well worth it). Yes, you can pay over $1500 on the website and hire a personal coach to work directly with you if you wish.
Next stage: Learn how to exploit my strengths and find someone who can cover for my weaknesses.
For example. lets suppose that I can rate talent and work both on a scale of 1 to 5. I have a talent for X that is weak, say a 1. But If I work and practice I may get my strength up to maybe a 3. 3*1=3. OK, then let's say I have a talent Y that is very strong, a 5. If I work just as hard as I did with with X I can get my strength up to 5*3=15! So clearly, it makes sense to work on your strengths, and (get this!) partner with someone who is strong where you are weak!
The original book has now been replaced by "StrengthsFinder 2.0". There is an example in the new book of a person who had the ability to make 100 pairs of shoes per week, but because he had to spend so much time at sales and collections (which he hated) he only could make 30 pairs a week. So, he got a partner who was good at collections and sales, and focused on his natural ability to make good shoes and more than tripled his income.
Point being, what do we normally do? In my case, I'm not very good at relating to others. So, I get sent to classes to teach me how to manage and relate, both things I am not good at and dislike. And I get marked down in reviews because I don't have very good communication and delegation skills. What should be happening is that I should be able to partner with someone that has the skills I lack and let me focus on improving my natural talents of learning and thinking.
Here is the brief summary of my strengths in relative order; anyone that has known me very long will recognize these:
Learner: The excitement is in the process of learning.
Intellection: Likes meaningful conversation; eschews idle chit-chat.
Input: Craving to know more.
Deliberative: Think about things first.
Ideation: Likes to find new and better ways to do things.
By the way, this aligns with some freebie tests I've taken on the Internet such as the Keirsey and Myers-Briggs. However, to get detailed results you need to spend $30-$50 for the results. The "StrengthsFinder 2.0" book cost me less than $20 (including shipping) from Amazon.com and includes the Internet test (maxed out my Visa to get it, but figure it is well worth it). Yes, you can pay over $1500 on the website and hire a personal coach to work directly with you if you wish.
Next stage: Learn how to exploit my strengths and find someone who can cover for my weaknesses.
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